Changing with Change

...is the changeless state. As this most interesting time of life proceeds, most divorce lawyers report that cases are now more about who "owes what" rather than who "owns what." Sit in a courtroom one day, and you will hear ex-spouses arguing about the fact that one has been unable to refinance the mortgage and take the other off. Or, one has failed to pay the credit card debt in accordance with the judgment, because they have lost their job. Of course, the first response to this change is to feel that the sky is falling, and life is over. However, it isn't. The flip side of sellers having a hard time selling, is that buyers are having a great time buying! There are some incredible deals out there. In fact I just read a newspaper article that said people from other states are coming to Detroit to take advantage of the ridiculous prices and get a steal. For those of us who are trying to go from being employees or self-employed, to being business owners and investors, the Michigan real estate market is the chance of a lifetime.

As for divorce, I find that people are a lot more receptive to my "mini-lectures" on making the divorce as drama-free as possible. Keeping the kids out of it and cooperating on parenting and other issues makes a lot more sense when no one has extra cash to throw around for lengthy court battles. And not too many people are determined to prove that they were right, and their spouse was wrong, anymore. Although they may wish for such things, pragmaticism has taken over. And I think that's a good thing.

The less emotional drama there is in a divorce, the less emotional baggage the parties will have to drag along with them into the future. And the more money they will have. Court is a bad place to resolve emotional issues. I recommend therapy or your own pursuit of personal development with any one of a dozen or more great sources. (If you're interested drop me a line and I'll be happy to share my picks on that.) For my own part, I created the Divorce Bailout Package, to help divorcing couples divorce like, well, adults. Cost-effective solutions that work. That's what we need right now.