Can Man Improve on the Beauty of Nature?

Usually, no. But every once in awhile an artist comes along and does something surprising. Please enjoy the following photos of watermelons and eggs enhanced with carving by hand or by laser. They're nothing short of amazing.

Pet Custody - An Ongoing Hot Topic

With good reason, of course! What would we do without our beloved furry friends? Sadly, even they can become involved in a divorce. Jeanne Hannah, an esteemed colleague, wrote about this topic. You may find it interesting, I did. http://jeannehannah.typepad.com/.services/blog/6a00d8341c74da53ef00d83451d5d269e2/search?filter.q=fido

A Time For Planting

(Fall Beauty, courtesy of Michigan)

"To everything there is a season, and a time for every purpose under Heaven," the Old Testament tells us. Seasons changes as they are right now; leaves turning yellow, red, and gold, then falling, only to be replaced with new in the Spring. People go through seasons, too.

Yet in our daily lives, we often expect ourselves to be the same, day in and day out. Zen Master Taisen Deshimaru says, "Some people treat their bodies like machines and try to keep them running indefinitely. Then they wear out and cannot find their balance, and then come sickness and death." We need to learn respect for our personal seasons.

Dr. Christianne Northrup, author of Women's Bodies, Women's Wisdom, compares a woman's menstrual cycle to the natural seasons. There is a time of the month when a woman extends outward to those around her, expressing herself and giving to others. And then there is a time when she turns inward, doing inner work and cleansing. She may not feel like being social or constantly on the go. Pushing herself to do so does not promote good health.

Seasons and cycles are how Nature progresses, and we can see how well it works. We see it in the trees and flowers. Flowers start at buds, then burst into bloom and show off their glory. In time they begin to wilt, and then to die. It is necessary to remove the old, dead flowers to allow the plant to put her enegy into creating new blooms, which replace the old. Given the right temperature, light, and care, this cycle continues without end.

Clear we, as part of Life, go through the same process. Have you ever noticed that some times in your life are overcrowded with people and activities? Maybe you have children that keep you on the run. Maybe your work pace is frenetic. Then at some point, you notice that things slow down. Projects get completed, kids grow up, jobs change, a marriage ends.

Do you then feel that something is wrong because your life has slowed down? It isn't. It simply means you have completed one phase of life. That part of your life has come to fruition and been harvested. The next, seemingly dormant phase, is equally important. It is the time for planting new seeds.

This is a time for you to release old relationships that have become toxic. To let go of activities that are no longer fulfilling. It is not time to rush into busy-ness. It is a time for stillness and nurturing. Use it to digest what has happened. What has served you, and what hasn't.

I remember when my husband and I first broke up and I felt like I was in a cocoon, yet I couldn't seem to snap out of it. I spent a lot of time reading and meditating, caring for my plants and animals and spending time alone. And it was the only place I wanted to be.

Despite criticism from others, I gave myself permission to be there. When the time came to be active, I was able to step into it, fortified with the wisdom and maturity I had gained from my quiet times. Had I not taken that time for me, I couldn't have responded as creatively as I did.

There is a story told about the Chinese bamboo tree. Its seed lies buried for 5 years, seemingly without activity. During that time it must be watered and fed or it will die in the ground. But if properly cared for, the Chinese bamboo begins to grow. It will grow 90 feet tall in sixty days. The question is, did it grow 90 feet tall in 60 days, or did it take 5 years?

The answer is obvious. It took five years of feeding and nurturing to bring it to the level where it could achieve such miraculous growth. The growth is impressive. But that seemingly dormant period beforehand was absolutely vital. And do you not think that you are capable of even more than a simple plant?

In my law practice, there are times when there is so much to do there are just not enough hours in a day to get it all done. I may work late into the night, making sure everything is taken care of. And then the cases get completed, or something else shifts, and there is quiet time.

Having learned from my past experience, I now savor and utilize these times to their fullest, instead of obsessing about not being constantly busy. Can you imagine what it would be like if the phone NEVER stopped ringing? Of course we all love to welcome new business but it is just as important to welcome the spaces in between.

Slower times are a time for planting. In order to plant you must first prepare the soil, remove the old debris and make room. Whether you are considering a new career direction, or a new direction altogether, it is the same. Slow times are the perfect time to explore your creativity. I spend my slow times writing or updating my blog, something I love to do and rarely have time for anymore. I use them to explore new ideas I have wanted to try, or to visit places I've wanted to go.

There is an ebb and flow to Life and I am a part of it. So are you. We cannot expect the waves to constantly crest; they must first subside and return to the sea. Marianne Williamson says that we are like waves on the ocean, each of us thinking that we are different from other waves and not realizing we are all part of the same ocean.

I agree. And once we realize this truth, we need to accept and allow the nature of waves. Everyone does not "crest" at the same time. We need to honor our seasons and get in touch with the power of stillness in motion. That is when the universal rhythm is felt. That is when we discover who we truly are. You can no more force yourself than you can force a flower to bloom. So don't try. Realize that you are in the right place, at the right time, doing the right thing. And so it is.

The Hazards of Being Technologically Impaired

Two days ago, I bought my first iPhone. Being slightly resistant to gadgets I don't know how to work, I didn't come by it voluntarily. No. I got it about two months after I left the charger for the old phone in Saugatuck, Michigan during a visit there. Since my "old" phone was so old they don't even make that charger anymore, I limped along using only the car charger until I finally decided enough was enough and bought the iPhone.

Getting it wasn't easy, either. First, I went to the AT & T store, who had none available. My son said to go to the source; the Apple store. There, after waiting in line for some time, I found out they also had none. Everyone who works there has a slight air of superiority, as if the rest of us just weren't quite up to speed on the latest technology (in my case, they're right). When I did speak to a salesperson, she told me about all the cool iPhone cases, crystal covers to protect the glass front and back, Mobile Me, etc. that one can get to make a cool phone even cooler. None of these items are available in the store, however. In fact, it seemed to me that very little was actually available in the store besides demo products. They just wanted the hoi polloi to know they existed.

Apple store employees also, apparently, have no idea when their products will be arriving. There's no day of the week when deliveries come; it's just something you have to call in the morning (early!) to find out. And if by fortunate chance a shipment has come in, you need to hightail it over there immediately to pick yours up. If instead you are sluggish like some of us, and wait until evening, the inventory has been depleted and you are relegated to calling the store the next day to see if another shipment has come in.

It looks like a great gig to me. They're mysterious, hard to get, and a treasure any fool would be lucky to get their hands on. So the buyers come flocking in, hoping for the chance to pay two hundred bucks for a cell phone. There doesn't seem to be any recession going on at the Apple store.

Nevertheless, after my second wasted trip, I decided just to go online and order it myself. (And by "I," I mean my son.) He ordered it, ported my existing number over, and lo and behold, 4 days later, my shiny new iPhone had arrived and was left sitting on my neighbor's porch. (They delivered it to the wrong address.) Still, it was a lot closer than I'd gotten for the last two weeks.

After all this excitement, it was time for my next big move: Figuring out how to turn it on, and use it. My son, in a hopeless attempt to get me to "figure things out for myself" told me to take it to the AT & T store after the phone had sat connected to my computer, allegedly transferring some application for two days. So off I went, and the accommodating staff quickly helped me complete the process of porting my number.

What a thrill! At last, now I can be checking my emails and furiously texting messages in court, as I have seen so many other lawyers do. As I walked out of the store, I decided to call my son just to let him know that I was all set, on my own. Then I noticed that all my "Contacts" were email addresses...no phone numbers. (That must have been the transfer that was taking place on my computer for those 2 days.)

Well, no matter. I'll just type the number in myself. I hit "Contacts," typed in Alex's name, and number. Then I sat in the parking lot, trying to figure out where the "Call" button was. Couldn't find it anywhere.

Being the highly educated professional that I am, I did what I always do when faced with such technological challenges. I got frustrated, and immediately blew my top at what kind of an idiotic device this (expletives deleted) iPhone was, anyway. After angry words and cursing didn't work, I resorted to using my old phone, which was sitting patiently in the car with about 30 seconds of power left. I called my son, asking him how in the heck I was supposed to use this stupid phone that had no call button. He patiently explained that I needed to press the line of text that listed his mobile phone number.

Oh.

Okay, so that went well. I called him back triumphantly...and found that he sounded like he was a million miles away, using a tin can. I turned the volume up to its highest level, told him to speak up; and still, nothing. Again, I was instantly frustrated and mad. By then I was back home, where I could prove to him that it wasn't me, it was this stupid, defective phone. He asked if I had asked them about it at the AT & T store. Of course not, I said. I left there the minute they got my phone working.

He couldn't figure it out, and I felt cheated, for having received such a faulty phone. Still, at his urging I went back to the store and told the clerk my problem. She said, "Take off the plastic." What?? No way could that fix this obvious defect. To humor her, I took it off. Much to my amazement, the volume was fine. After two days of waiting, I could now make a phone call!

To all you show-offs out there who are laughing at me for being in the Dark Ages of phones, I say just wait! Another month or so, and I'll have figured out how to use the calendar. (Okay, it's not quite that bad, but close.) And frankly, I haven't even tried to check my email.

I've heard it said that crossword puzzles, and trying new things, are great ways to keep your mind sharp. Well I don't like crossword puzzles, but it looks to me like I've got a year's worth of opportunities to try new things with my new iPhone alone. And luckily for me, I've got two smart kids for backup, that seem to know all about them.

Look Out, World. Michigan's Coming Back!!

Dateline 4 August 2010: In a Yahoo! real estate article discussing which housing markets will be the strongest by 2014, Michigan came in third behind top-contender Washington State, and second-place Oregon. Okay, maybe it's not time to open the champagne yet, but according to the article, by the year 2014, housing prices are expected to jump 33.1% in the Detroit-Livonia-Dearborn area.

It's true that, since reaching a peak in 2006, housing prices have plummeted 60.5 percent, so we're really only regaining half of that former value. But who cares? If "no bad news" is the new "good news," then a 30% increase has got to be considered fantastic! All the more reason to revel in our beautiful state.

Remember to Chill

OK, I will admit it if you will: I have forgotten the names of people while I was talking to them! I have lost my car keys, misplaced my glasses and forgotten why I walked into a room.

How about you? Does it seem like your memory is playing tricks on you as you age? Well, there are reasons for that and very few of these reasons are related to diseases such as dementia and Alzheimer’s.

As a straight-A student back in college, I would pore over my study notes until they were etched into my brain, just before a test. It was almost like cheating. I would study right up until a few hours before the exam, then go in and take the test. The notes were so clear in my head that I could literally go through the pages and find the correct answer. I took that ability for granted, until the end of last year.

In December 2009, I began noticing that I had trouble remembering things. This caused me some alarm, and I began a quest to improve my short term memory. Where else but Google, of course! I found nuritional supplements that allegedly increased oxygen to the brain; a major cause of memory loss, and also discovered a site which proclaimed it was a "Virtual Mental Gymnasium" - My Brain Trainer (http://www.mybraintrainer.com/).

Both were helpful, especially My Brain Trainer. The site offers free exercises that test your brain's age, among other things. I became a huge fan, and would start each day doing the "brain age" exercise until my brain tested at a mere 21 years old. I also took the nutritional supplements religiously.

Nevertheless, there were times when I played the Memory Game on My Brain Trainer and felt despair. The Memory Game has 3 different levels; beginner, intermediate, and advanced. The beginner level, for example, has 16 pictures of animals (8 matches), which it displays for a short period of time. The pictures then disappear, and the goal is to remember where the matches are. Time after time, I was frustrated at the number of tries it took me to get them all. As the pictures disappeared, so did my memory of where they were!

Then at the end of March, I went to visit my friends in Japan. Such wonderful friends they are! They had everything planned for me, and took care of all the arrangements. The only things on my "to do" list were showing up on time for a tour, or deciding where I wanted to shop that day.

But the best thing of all was how loving and accepting my friends were of me! Never mind that Americans are quite a different lot than Japanese, in so many ways. They loved being with me, and I loved being with them. Although in general I lead a very pleasant life, I can remember going to bed at night in Japan, and just feeling pure happiness.

One night in Hong Kong, I played the Memory Game on my laptop, just for the heck of it. To my astonishment, my memory had vastly improved! And that's when I learned the real cause of memory loss - stress.

Stress kills your memory. The stress system is designed to ensure survival. It helps us fight off an attacking dog or flee from a snarling bear. As important as that is, however, we humans do more each day than merely survive. Stress releases cortisol in the brain, and that can lead to a myriad of different problems for us. If we want to have a good, healthy memory, we need to do all we can to reduce the need for fight or flight stress responses.

Not easy in this modern world of increasing challenges, but essential. Interestingly, when I first returned from Japan my memory quiz scores had improved by 30%. But as time marched on and I got caught up in the ups and downs of Life, I saw my scores return to their former levels. I noticed that if I am in the middle of a quiz and hear a distracting noise, my scores drop even further.

We're all in this world together, so I imagine I am not alone in this problem. And unfortunately, we are not always surrounded by loving friends who appreciate us. Instead we often feel surrounded by nothing but problems.

But there are things we can do to chill out in the midst of the maelstrom. Taking a nap in the afternoon while listening to soft music, if you can do it, is a great way to shift gears and leave the tension behind. Watching a comedy is another. So is petting a dog or cat (unconditional love is good for the soul).

The most effective way of all, however, is to remember to stay present. To be in the moment, not regretting the past or worrying about the future, is the best way to eliminate stress. The next time you feel stressed, remember to ask yourself, "What is lacking in this moment?"

Usually, nothing. It's just that our minds have run away with us. Sometimes we are so caught up in our minds that we don't even realize where we are.

As one person, we can't change the world. But we can change the world within. And when we do, we can begin to remember what it feels like to be at peace. We can begin to remember.

Is Less Really More?

" In 1845, Henry David Thoreau (1817-1862) quit work at his Dad's pencil factory in Concord, Massachusetts and moved to Walden Pond, where he remained for two and a half years, building a small cabin in deep woods and undertaking an experiment in solitary living..." Thoreau's cabin cost him under $30 to build, (today's cost: about $700)

In 1854, he published "Walden," a famous work, considered by some to be practical philosophy, a "how-to" for alternative living, an atheistical guide for the perplexed, or just natural history. Although virtually unnoticed for 60 years, it came in time to be judged the finest example of writing in America, not only at home, but in Europe where it is even more highly regarded.

To some of us, myself included, this seems like a quaint but unrealistic way to live. Yet, as more and more of us are living longer and longer, the trend is clearly toward simplicity. So what's wrong with living simply and not having to buy the latest bling?

Nothing, according to an article, "The Leap to Cheap," I just read in the July/August AARP (yes, that's right. AARP. They have a great magazine.) Written by self-proclaimed cheapskate, Jeff Yeager, the author rode his 30-year-old bicycle across the country to interview people who are living "alternative" lifestyles.

By "alternative," he means, making due with less, anti-consumerism types who wash their own dishes instead of using a dishwasher (to save water and energy), whose children delight in finding their prom dress for $12.50 at the thrift store, and who love to go out shopping...so they can laugh at the foolish things other people spend their money on. In short, people whom I spent most of my life thinking of as weird.

For example, I remember a friend of mine, who loved to go shopping at a place she called "Valu Valage" (i.e., value village). A former judge whose father was a doctor, it wasn't for lack of cash that she bought on the cheap. But I didn't understand that at the time. I went with her once, and cringed as she pored over pre-worn outfits, looking for her daughter's homecoming dress. I was so shocked I ended up giving her a gold-sequinned Oleg Casini dress I'd worn just once, for her daughter to have. Just so she wouldn't buy resale.

But that's the old way of thinking. Now, buying resale is where it's at. To me, such things reminded me of my lower-middle class upbringing, of poverty. Saving pennies, doing without and such, not me! Interestingly, though, when the 2008 stock market crash wreaked havoc on a stalled economy, many of us began to downsize and in the process re-discovered our lives. That is, our family and friends.

In the AARP article, the author interviewed a family of former high rollers, who now revel in the wealth of their family connections. The husband, formerly a high-level executive, quit his corporate job a decade ago and started a home inspection business with his wife. They typically earn $80,000 a year and a few years back moved from their 8,000 square foot house to a home one/third that size.

"Moving made us realize how much we owned that wasn't being used and wasn't necssary," says the wife. When they considered how much most of us Americans have compared to the rest of the world, they were embarassed.

After reading this article, I began to understand and appreciate the trend toward down-sizing and simplicity. It makes a lot of sense. We are all (hopefully!) living longer, healthier lives. If we are going to be around a long time, we need to start living smarter. I mean, simpler, and enjoy the dailly blessings we are surrounded with every day.